House debates

Tuesday, 26 October 2021

Statements by Members


1:51 pm

Photo of Tim WattsTim Watts (Gellibrand, Australian Labor Party, Shadow Assistant Minister for Communications and Cyber Security) Share this | | Hansard source

The elite and out-of-touch British aristocracy would often address their servants by their job titles—cook and boots—instead of having to learn their names. The Duke of Portland took this a step further and forced his servants to face the wall as he passed. But not even the dukes and duchesses of the Old Dart were as out of touch as this Treasurer, who last night showed that he does not even see the staff working for him.

In August, the Treasurer told Sunrise the cringiest story of his time staying at the Lodge with the PM:

He's actually on the dishes, would you believe, because it's just the two of us there.

After we've had dinner we both get the scrubbing brush and go for it.

You might not believe it but it's true.

… … …

We pop the spaghetti bolognaise—or … the schnitzel—into the microwave…

He thought this was such a good story he told it twice, this time to ABC News Breakfast:

… it is just the two of us, Michael, so he has been on the scrubbing brush, I've been using the microwave, we've both been cooking up … chicken schnitzel.

Why he thought anyone in modern Australia would be impressed by two men who thought that a microwave and a scrubbing brush were novelties, in the first place, is a mystery, but the cringe factor of this modern day upstairs-downstairs farce went through the roof when we learnt at Senate estimates last night, through questioning from Senator Marielle Smith, that in fact it was not just the two of them at the Lodge. The Lodge was fully staffed as normal. It just seemed to escape the attention of this out-of-touch Treasurer, or perhaps the reality just didn't fit with the fake persona that this Treasurer was trying to create. It sums up the Morrison government: fake, fake, fake.