Craig Kelly (Hughes, Liberal Party) Share this | Link to this | Hansard source

Last week, a constituent drew to my attention the amazing resemblances between the Treasurer and this government with the dysfunctional Clark W Griswold, played by Chevy Chase, and his family and the 1989 movie National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation. In yet another colossal forecasting error by this Treasurer, he has promised $15 billion worth of spending, expecting this revenue to come from the mining tax. But with the mining tax only raising a fraction of what he has forecast, Australia now has no revenue to pay for Labor's promises. Likewise, in National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation, expecting to receive a Christmas bonus, Clark W Griswold wrote cheques before he had received the bonus. Instead of a bonus, he received one year's free membership to a Jell-O of the Month Club. Although Labor's mining tax has grossed $126 million, when you remove the lower company tax payments and the administration costs, it has raised almost nothing. In fact, Australia would probably be better off with a free membership to a Jell-O of the Month Club than with Labor's mining tax.

Just as the Treasurer's and this government's reckless spending has set off a domino effect of disasters and chaos, the same happened for the Griswold household. Just as the Treasurer has overcooked the books and failed to deliver a surplus, in the Griswold household at Christmas, they overcooked the Christmas turkey. In trying to excuse this mistake, Clark says, 'It's just a little dry'. When he goes to cut it, it cracks open, with the dust going everywhere, leaving everyone to chew on old bones for their Christmas dinner. That seems like a perfect analogy for this government's promises.

Next, take the analogy of what former members of the New South Wales Labor government are doing to Labor's already tarnished reputation in Western Sydney with their toxic culture. In Christmas Vacation, Clark Griswold's cousin, who is coincidently called Eddie, turns up uninvited with his family in their mobile home, and then starts to empty his chemical toilet down the stormwater drain. Clark laments:

He oughta know it's illegal. That's a storm sewer. If it fills with gas, I pity the person who lights a match within ten yards of it.

Then later, Uncle Lewis lights up a cigar and tosses the match down the sewer, setting off an explosion and sending their Christmas decorations into orbit. Madam Speaker, doesn't that remind you of the current ICAC inquiry in New South Wales?

And then there is the analogy of the EU's imploding carbon price, undermining the entire premise of the carbon tax and leaving a smouldering multibillion-dollar black hole in the forward estimates. In Christmas Vacation, Aunt Bethany's cat chewed through the electrical cable of the Christmas lights and electrocuted itself, destroying Clark's favourite armchair, and leaving a smouldering black hole in the Griswold's carpet.

And then there is the analogy of the treatment of the family's Christmas tree in the National Lampoon's movie with the Prime Minister's treatment of Senator Crossin. In Christmas Vacation, when Clark brings home the tree, he undoes the branches in the living room. Expecting applause from everyone, he instead sees the branches fling open and smash the windows of the house. Then later, Uncle Lewis manages to burn down the Christmas tree, setting himself on fire in the process. With Clark's response to this despair, he says:

So what's the matter with you … it's finally out of its misery.

Then there is the analogy of what many of the Labor members must have been thinking of this Christmas time. With chaos and confusion reigning in the household, Clark's good wife, Ellen Griswold, says:

I don't know what to say except it's Christmas, and we're all in misery.

Then there is the analogy of the resignations of senior government ministers. While we are left to ponder the words that the Prime Minister might have used to lift her dispirited troops and dissuade more of them from jumping ship, in Christmas Vacation, with disaster after disaster unfolding, Clark demands of his family, in what could be a word-for-word quote from the PM:

Where do you think you're going? Nobody's leaving. Nobody's walking out on this fun … No, no … We're gonna press on.

And finally, there is the analogy with the message that the member for Griffith might likely be telling the PM's wavering supporters. As disarray, disorder and dysfunction engulf the Griswold household, Clark bemoans:

Could things get any worse? Take a look around here, Ellen … We're on the threshold of hell!

No question, Madam Speaker, the similarities between Clark W Griswold and this Treasurer are uncanny.