House debates

Wednesday, 9 September 2015

Constituency Statements

Depp, Mr Johnny

10:29 am

Photo of Rick WilsonRick Wilson (O'Connor, Liberal Party) Share this | Hansard source

I rise today to commend the great actor Johnny Depp on his latest performance on the world stage, reviving his role as the swashbuckling pirate Captain Jack Sparrow in the latest incarnation of the blockbuster Pirates of the Caribbean series. However, in this sequel, it is on our island that the grave misadventure takes place. Ahoy! There be smuggling of two pooches named Boo and Pistol. Next, the illegal stowaways are discovered after a trip to a Queensland groomer turns into a famous photo shoot. Enter the villain, federal Minister for Agriculture Barnaby Joyce, who proclaims that Johnny's treasures will be 'doomed for destruction' if they are not despatched within the passing of 48 hours. Suspense rises to fever pitch—will our hero save the day? Then, in a cruel twist of fate, Mr Depp is revealed as the bad guy for allowing his international terriers to breach Australia's stringent border security. As he now ridicules Australia's strict biosecurity laws, does he not see that he himself is the fool for not recognising that two seemingly harmless pets could jeopardise an entire nation's health?

Australia, being 'girt by sea', is blessed to have natural boundaries to disease and pestilence, but these are not immune to foreign incursions via sea and air. We cannot police every entry to our shores. We rely to some extent on visitors being honest and doing the right thing. In this case, Mr Depp's deception was deliberate and foolhardy. Mr Depp's jetsetting pooches travel the globe, to countries with diseases we are fortunate to be free of. Many of these can be transmitted to humans by dogs. For example, rabies has an incubation period of up to several months and, although the progression of the disease after this time is rapid, the virus can be found in the dog's saliva several days before the onset of clinical signs. Could a Boo bite be fatal to an unwitting groomer? Recent rabid ramblings from Mr Depp would tend to suggest he is unconcerned about the dire disease risk his pooches potentially posed. The USA has many tick-borne diseases Australia is free from. What if Pistol had such a parasite?

By allowing his pets to enter Australia without complying with basic quarantine measures such as treatment for common external and internal parasites, Mr Depp's dogs could potentially introduce other debilitating diseases to our citizens, our pets, our livestock and our iconic Australian wildlife. As for Mr Depp now proclaiming to have eaten his dogs on the instructions of our agriculture minister, it would seem he lives in a world as fantastical as the characters he played in Edward Scissorhands, Charlie and the Chocolate Factory and Alice in Wonderland.

In closing, I echo Minister Joyce's sentiment when I suggest that Mr Depp too should head off back to the USA with his international terriers if he does not see the logic in upholding Australia's stringent biosecurity measures. It is my hope that, through upholding strict, sensible and scientific quarantine measures, Australia will remain free of the plagues, pestilence and parasitism suffered by our neighbours near and far.

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